Sunday, January 14, 2007

2006 in Review

I have been informed by the intrepid blogging community that it is a tradition amongst bloggers to repost the first sentence or two of every blog entry they made that year. I'm a bit late. Deal.

Being that I have written 237 blogs in 2006, this post is somewhat long. But, it's also somewhat funny… at least, to me. I especially like how it starts. (PS – Don't let me start a blog with the word 'so' ever again. I find that annoying upon review.) I think the quality of my blogging declined over time, but I'm going to blame that on... anything but me. You pick. Just not me.


Disclaimer to the Universe:
Please do not jinx me for finally being optimistic about this job. Thank you.

I’ve been having the weirdest dreams lately where really odd things are happening and I refuse to wake up because I can’t imagine what I’ll do next, it just feels so bizarre.

I am not: dead. Yet.

I’m excited to watch the opening ceremonies of the Winter Games tonight.

I posted prematurely. I don't know what I was thinking. There's more crackpot mayhem on TV now.

Whoa... what happened? All of a sudden there are celebrities all over the place. Susan Sarandon, Sophia Loren, Yoko Ono, Peter Gabriel. Isn't the Olympics about sports? I forget.

But I love sports movies.

My plan to influence the Neilson ratings single handedly has been found out.

The luge is the strangest sport around.

So, this Valentine’s Day was not as cool as last year when I went to the morgue.

The Search Continues… for the most insane Olympian.

Lindsey Kildow may not be winning metals, but she’s got the absolute right idea about national television.

More insects in my diet.

For those of you living in a bubble... I'm moving.

Okay, so I got a call from the US Women’s Curling team asking that I please comment on them, or their sport, and to be my witty, wonderful self.

Yes, I have very odd concerns.

For the duration of the women’s figure skating competition, I will be cheering for Joannie Rochette of Canada.


I took a personality quiz online and decided to share it here because for once it seemed to really apply, almost in its entirety.

Nikki, on her way out for the evening, turned off the overhead light in her bedroom and headed for the door.

We went to Moxie’s tonight.

Yesterday I was introduced to Midwestern weather.

Today Alison berated me for not having an emergency kit prepared for bad weather.

You Are Dr. Pepper

I’ve been doing a lot of reading of scientific journal articles at work and have come across words that I didn’t necessarily know… but apparently was supposed to.

Henry just turned over 10,000 miles today on the way home from work.

Ovine – Relating to or like a sheep.

I know you’re sick of these but I’ve finished the first section of reading I was given, so hopefully there won’t be more for a little while.

There are some geniuses out there with a lot of extra time on their hands who have taken it upon themselves to re-tool the trailers of some of our most beloved movies and turn them into something else.

I got one email today.

The term room temperature is misleading.

Another great thing about moving out of my old place...

Thanks to Brenda and Beth... I've stolen this. So, me too.

There’s been a big news story for the past several days about a home invasion where the victim shot and killed two men who allegedly kicked in his door.

On this day in 1979, there was a major nuclear accident at Three Mile Island in Middletown, PA.

Update - Training advancement.

Hey, did you know there was a setting in here where you could allow anyone, even non-members to post comments?

You know who I don’t hear about anymore? Tai Shan, my little Butterstick.

Lebanon Valley College is tiny and in the middle of nowhere.

Today during my reading I came across a biology term that sent me right back to freshman bio, finals week, when I was helping J cram for our last exam.

I’ve decided I want to change my job title from “Criminalist” to “Crime Fighter” simply because it sounds more superhero-y.

Study Fails to Show Healing Power of Prayer

I wanted to share this conversation I had recently with all of you, but I had to sort of recreate it since there was no way I was to know at the time that it’d end up being so hilarious (to me at least).

I could listen to this song on repeat for days.

I have often wished that I had a way to see into the future, limited only to a few days and specifically for the purpose of knowing what the gas prices will be – lest I accidentally ruin something important.

Today in history (April 13), Commander James Lovell spoke the infamous words, "Houston, we've got a problem," aboard the ill-fated flight of Apollo 13.


The Police really know how to celebrate.

I went out and shot some pool tonight, in addition to standing around and watching other people shoot pool… which, worked as I’d hoped and I was invited to play with some other people.

Overall, you scored as follows: 11% scored higher (more nerdy) and 89% scored lower (less nerdy).

Many people don't really think about it, but the best thing about claiming Jesus is a Zombie is that all the Christians can't get mad at me.

I have lots of Madonna music.

My dog is turning 5 today.

Imagine my surprise this morning as I was driving to work when I saw that the 14 cent "Wednesday Price Hike" came a day early.

My entire morning was spent editing and updating my case reports after they had been rejected by peer review.

Today in history in 1999, the deadliest school shooting in US history occured at Columbine High School in Littleton, CO.

The only people that are going to be in the trace section at work on Monday are me and my boss.

Jake Gyllenhaal is the perfect man.

I was the supervisor of everyone in the trace section for an hour today.

Today we filed a bunch of older case evidence in the walk-in freezer.

I wrote a blog and stupid Microsoft Word shut down on me.

I was in the shower this morning looking forward to lunch today and I figured something out - A plan for my future should something go horribly wrong.

I totally rocked my cell ID test today.

Okay, they weren't mine.

Dear Blog, Today was an awesome day.

I was reading the April 15th issue of Science News today at work.


Okay, so I signed up for the Blockbuster online whatever-it's-called-thing and have been getting movies sent to my apartment and getting an additional free rental every week at Blockbuster.

Attn: Green Car Drivers

I moved really far away from all of my favorite people.

Damn! My missions were thwarted by a friendly customer service rep!

I really don't know why it took me so long to see this movie.

3 boxes weighing 47, 47 and 48 pounds

I have three rings that I wear every day.

CMT has had a marathon on all day of this show.

Is it wrong that all I wanna do is sleep in this new bed of mine?

There are a whole bunch of things I should do tonight before leaving for the weekend.

You're not going to believe this. I totally vacuumed.

Yay! Multiple dog weekend!

I used the plural form of this word because I doubt that one person would have done this on their own.

I find that when I travel for long distances, I get attached to traffic around me – especially cars that drive like I do - with cruise control set at or slightly above the speed limit.

I saw my first lightning bug of the season tonight.

A businessman walks into a bank in Washington, DC and asks for the loan officer.

The radio station I was listening on the way home from the grocery store (I remembered where it was and everything! My checkbook says I haven't been there since 4/23. Isn't that amazing?) tonight was playing things I haven't heard in a long time.

Woo! 666!

Damn! I accidentally fell asleep waiting for the show to come on Bravo tonight, and when I woke up, it was half over.

Iraq's al-Qaida leader al-Zarqawi was killed.

It's 11pm and whoever it is that lives above me is vacuuming.

I got my dinner comped tonight at Ruby Tuesday's because I found a hair in my meal.

Heh... remember the last time I went to the morgue? What a fun day.

For those weak of heart or stomach, you might not want to read this. For people who continually ask me if I've seen a dead body today, the answer would be yes.

It's June.

I thought I'd keep you updated on only the unusual symptoms of my cold.

I'm a much happier person when I can breathe easily through my nose.

True, the basic theme of every movie they make is the same, but it works.

I went out to a bar with fellow classmates from my CSI school tonight.


Today in class we did like 12 practical assignments involving fingerprint development.

In list form!

Jessica Simpson... you totally stole Madonna's song "Holiday" and tried to pass it off as your own.

Guys Like That You're Sensitive

What a nice employer.

I'm not going to deny that global warming exists.

Temperature: 98.4

Summer Movie Vintage Mustang Count now at two.

Same colors and shapes and explosions.

Yes, I know that for the first time in a long time I have health insurance.

Okay, so, remember how I said I missed going to see the Maple Shade Fireworks display with J?

Not that there was reason to worry.

I stole the following post from one of my friends from undergrad, and I didn't tell him about it.

I picked up my new front door key this evening when I came home from work – as I was locked out of my apartment.

So, I've decided to take advantage of the fact that the KCPD is sending me to Chicago for a week and I bought a ticket to go see Wicked at The Ford Center Oriental Theater.


So, I saw Pirate's Dead Man's Chest last night and through the eternally long movie kept thinking about how organ music is creepy.

That's how you spell Chicago.

These were all made on the last day of the PLM class at the McCrone Research Institute in Chicago.

Sunday night after arriving at the hotel I unpacked my things so I wasn't living out of a suitcase like I usually do on trips.


Your Five Factor Personality Profile

Your Eyes Should Be Brown

So, remember how I went to crime scene school so I could be put on this special list that lets me go out and actually work crime scenes?

Tuesday evening I went to dinner at the oldest Italian restaurant in Chicago called The Italian Village.

When I got up this morning and headed for the shower, I decided I'd weigh myself on the way.

Again, in summarized list form because, once again, I am lazy.

Someone help!

I wanted to just point out that the date today is kinda cool, no?


We all know her.

Right along side of Million Dollar Baby… we have World Trade Center. Two movies that you should see once and only once.

Okay, so kill me, I hate Outkast's song Hey Ya.

Which Of The Seven Deadly Sins Are You?

I totally brought home two Science and a Discover magazine from work today.

So, I got a call today while at work from the Phoenix Police asking me if I was still interested in the Forensic Scientist job I applied for back in October of 2005.

Saint Exupery's The Little Prince Quiz

This here is Lily Allen.

One of my coworkers had been on vacation all last week and had evidence sitting at her bench the entire time she was gone.

So, between me and my coworker... today we got pissed off at the flies and brought their reign of terror to an end.

"I am guaranteeing that Snakes on a Plane will win best movie next year."

So, I know Death Cab For Cutie has been around for a while - as I've had their music downloaded on my computer for some time - but I finally thought I'd peruse the collection of "new downloads" I have on my computer from well over the past six months and finally listen to them.

I'm ranting.

Hey, look, I finally got around to developing my pictures from Chicago!

Well, it's official.

So, tonight I went to a free screening of Shut Up and Sing about the Dixie Chicks.

I'm currently back near the top of the list for getting called out on crime scenes.

Someone should have warned me that there are 400 billion spiders in Missouri before I moved here.


Yep, I'm that bored again.

Today must be a statewide holiday for everyone with a Missouri license plate.

Today I found out that my DNA's finally been run at the lab in case I end up contaminating anything.

Recently astronomers decided to boot Pluto from our solar system and downgrade its status as an official planet.

Look over here!

Guess who I saw on TV for the first time in ages while watching the Emmys tonight.

No one remembered.

So, I rented season one and watched it.

As I sat down in the bathroom, I noticed a bug of some sort crawling along my pajama pants.

So, they've finally started construction on my old undergrad science building, well loved Garber.

Here’s what I remember of the Renaissance Festival: It was magic.

You Are a Life Blogger!

For some unknown reason there was a photographer from the Kansas City Star at the Lee's Summit Hospital this evening while I was taking my first aid training class.


"Shawnee Mission KIA, just a short drive. Shawnee Mission Parkway and I-35."

Please read that headline again and note how it is just saturated and dripping with the most sarcasm you have ever heard in your entire life.

Soooo... maybe this is where all my brain cells went.

Your Bumper Sticker Should Be

The forces of evil combined in my apartment today.

I went to the air show today.

While in the sun, if you know you're getting burnt and are already in pain, yet continue to stay in the sun... you're probably in store for a miserable existence in the coming days.

Ha Ha!!

Today at work everyone I saw had a comment for me… from "Man, you look really red," to "What the hell did you do to yourself?" to "What were YOU doing this weekend?"

I'm leaving out a Chipotle burrito and a Dr Pepper tonight, just like milk and cookies for Santa.

I've been "busy" recently and haven't posted anything for your reading pleasure.

On Friday morning a transformer blew at work causing the power to go out.


I got called out on scene last night at midnight.

I just got home from Trivia Night up at O'Dowd's in Zona Rosa.

Basically, Blog has become my own little scrapbook.

Okay, so I'm going to try to watch Survivor this season and Blog about it, by request (much like the US Olympic Curling team did back in February).

Okay, so I know you're not really going to believe this... but I was robbed today.

I'll be out of town in Ankeny, Iowa until Wednesday evening.

I finally figured it out - The reason that CSI is so unrealistic for me.

I'm doing this as a public service for EVERYONE.

Okay, so I don't have a whole lot of things to say about Survior this week.

I made zucchini bread this evening.

What the World Needs Now... is hugs, FREE HUGS!

So American Eagle is running these aerie ads in conjunction with Gilmore Girls and Veronica Mars (the reasons to be alive on Tuesdays, and the only thing I watch on the network).

The cricket that could easily win a world record for the loudest chirp is currently residing somewhere in the deep recesses of my kitchen.

By Greg Small

Stranger than Fiction

Lauren Graham was on Studio 60 tonight and will be on the show again next week.

So, Thursday at 8am I'm lecturing at crime scene school for an hour on sexual assault evidence - preservation, recovery, concerns, lab capabilites, etc. Remember back in June when I attended crime scene school? Yeah, same one.

I had my first Irish car bomb tonight.

I drove my car to the automatic carwash today because it was dirty.

Tonight I'll be at UMKC's indoor track walking around in 18 oblong circles.

I killed another spider in my apartment recently.

I'll be out of town for the next week attending the Advanced Polarized Light Microscopy course offered by McCrone Research Institute.

Erin Daniels lives on.

I heard about this on the radio today.

This is slightly overdue, but… I got to drive around an unmarked police car this past week.

For the past several days I've had the Veronica Mars theme song (We Used To Be Friends - The Dandy Warhols) stuck firmly in my brain.

If you're voting in KC and haven't taken the time to look at some of the things that are showing up on your ballot tomorrow, here's a brief and non-encompassing overview of some of the issues:

I'm blogging to you from a remote undisclosed location where, through my indigo colored classes, I see the Democrats taking majority control over both the House and the Senate and Republicans consecutively thanking God during their concession speeches.

Yes, I jumped the gun last night (or rather, early this morning) in reporting the winners of the Senate race.

I actually thought I was going crazy tonight.


I helped a 15 year old figure out how to do her algebra homework this evening because she missed her last class.

I'm getting the biggest, meanest, scariest dog that money can buy.

Today I purchased renter's insurance and got a dead bolt installed on my back door.

My new roommate moved in this afternoon and Thor, reluctantly moved on to his next security job.

I may have accidentally named my dog.

What I really need is a better camera that doesn't have a broken self timer.

Remy didn't pack a single thing for the trip to Texas.

Here are a few photos from the holiday.

I was just listening to the news and the weather came on.

Obviously I have a good father.

I had a dream that I was at the airport with my dog and I lost her.

I should really start watching the news.

Not much else for me to add to this brilliance.

Remy lulled me into a false sense of secuirty this week.

Blogger's been bugging me to update to their new system for the past... oh... 2 months?

She really is a watchdog!

Tonight I paid off my credit card.

I just watched a teaser for the new Harry Potter flick.

Yesterday I turned in my very first crime scene report and diagrams from the scene I went out to... ooooh, two months ago and worried that there would need to be many corrections made to it.

Today I got sucked into YouTube for... well, frankly, hours.

I've been doing a lot of reading at work recently since the lab is currently under construction.

1. I had to get the computer guru at work to help me fix a little problem I made for myself when I inadvertently changed a folder option in control panel that I shouldn't have.

This just in from your friendly neighborhood criminalist: I'm a criminalIST, not a criminal!

My dog is wagging her tail in her sleep.

I was looking over 2005 year end numbers the other day at work because I got an email from one of the task force meetings focused on sexual assaults in the state of Missouri.

I suppose everyone that does this sort of feels the same when they get the results.

I'm not a thoughtful or ambitious person, but many of the people I know are.

Remember how I said that Kansas City was the place to be not too long ago? Well... oops.

I went to the Cowboy Mouth concert on Thursday night in Kansas City at the VooDoo Lounge in Harrah's Casino.

Oh! I nearly forgot!

Mom, mumbling under her breath as she peers into the refrigerator: "This is a crisis. This is a ketchup crisis. The great ketchup crisis of two thousand and six."

And she's totally right, too.

Probably the worst thing that I could have gotten for Christmas was a digital camera with video capabilities.

End Blog.

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