Sunday, August 14, 2005

Destination: Kansas City

I have a job interview this week in Kansas City, Missouri.

Now - get ready for a bunch of ifs -

If the interview goes well...
And
If they call me back for a polygraph…
And
If I pass the polygraph…
And
If they offer me the job…

…I’m going to take it.

Initially I had just applied to see what would happen. I didn’t expect to be called. I didn’t expect to get an interview. I never expected I’d make a move that large by myself.

And I never believed in fate and karma.

But something has been wanting me in Missouri since 1998.

Although, Missouri has a way of crushing my spirits and letting me down. Take Washington University, for example. They didn’t accept me even though it was the only place on Earth I wanted to go to school. It led to total devastation and anger and tears and disappointment. But it did direct me to four great years… okay, three great years at LVC and the bestest friends ever. And I eventually went to a school with Washington and University in the title. But neither of the schools equaled the amount of love I had for the one in St. Louis.

And now Missouri is showing promising opportunity yet again. Maybe Kansas City is friendlier than St. Louis. (And from what I’ve been told, it is.)

But I don’t want to get my hopes up. Missouri has been very mean to me in the past. (Yes, I generalize to the whole state. What are you gonna do about it?) Although, maybe somehow it knew that I needed a few years before I ended up there.

Because it feels like home. Where I belong.

Although, I do know what happens when I find something I love in Missouri. Rejection.

So I refuse to think I’m getting this job… even though I really, really want it.

Maybe it's time to face the music - I'm just not good enough for Missouri.

End Blog.

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