Fact: Everything You'll Ever Need is Already in Your Basement

Good thing I have a basement.

Sadly, my "fix" for my toilet did not last all that long. This really isn't all that surprising. I was hopeful, but didn't expect much. Although, the last flood did catch me off guard... again. But, as it turns out, I am a genius for the way I finally came about the part to fix it properly.

The toilet overflowed late at night. Late enough for all the hardware stores to be closed. I was angry. Mostly because I didn't want to buy the whole replacement part, but also in conjunction with the fact that my solution to the problem didn't work. The best part about this story is that the parts I "fixed" the toilet with went missing. I think they may have somehow gotten flushed down the toilet, or were stolen by toilet gnomes.

So, I'm sitting on my couch, being angry, when I have an epiphany and realize that I really am a super genius. You see, I have a toilet in my basement that is fully functional, but is never used because it's in an unfinished basement... and, who would want to go down there and drop their drawers? (I have used it twice before in dire circumstances. Don't judge me.)

Therefore, said toilet was eligible to become a spare parts superstore that late at night. And, as luck would have it, basement toilet and bathroom toilet are the same kind. They share the same types of parts! I have a basement full of replacement parts!

So, I pilfered the thing I needed and my toilet has been fixed ever since. If only I had thought of that in the first place! It would have been free.

So, anyway, on the off chance that you were entertaining the notion of using my basement bathroom... good luck.


End Blog.

They Don't Sell Magic

What a surprise. The part I need for my toilet tank mechanics isn't something that's sold by itself. And wouldn't you know it, all the major parts that I can buy are not similar to my own toilet, so I can't just buy the whole flush valve and only use the cap for the overflow tube because most of them don't have one. That's right, the part that seems to be so vital in my toilet isn't so vital in any other toilet because the part doesn't even really exist. Probably why mine committed suicide. It felt alone in the world.

I thought that I could just get a longer refill tube and stick it down into the overflow tube and all would be well. I mean, that's how all normal toilets seem to work. But, alas, no. I don't have one of those float ball type of toilets. No, mine has a different mechanism for stopping the water, and it broke. It's part of the flush valve. That is why the back of my toilet tank overfloweth, flooding the floor of my bathroom, and causing a super special leak into my basement.

So, I did what anyone would do in this situation. I made my own solution to the problem. I have fashioned something that seems to work, and work well. The troubling question is - how long is it going to work? I know I'll panic every time I have to flush in the next few days, but if it works, I'll forget about this mishap and then when I least expect it, my toilet will explode again.

I wish you could have seen my bathroom. Water sprayed all over the walls from the refill tube. It was like a cartoon hose flipping all about under pressure. Everything got wet, including me. It was pretty awesome.

Man, where is Hermione Granger when you need her? At least it's working now, albeit, not through magic.

My own ingenuity saves the day!


End Blog.


PS - The propane tank on my gas grill leaks. I'm afraid to fix it because it really MIGHT blow up, but I think all it needs is a new valve thing-a-ma-jig or some rubber gaskets or something. Did I think to look for anything to repair my grill? No. Of course not.

I wonder if I could hire a handyman who would also be a maid. That would be a splendid service.

My Toilet Runneth Over

Some magical thing that usually lives peacefully inside my toilet tank has committed suicide. And apparently, it was the glue that made all the other toilet parts love each other and work together in blissful harmony. Without it, a great flood has taken place in my bathroom. I am now on a quest to find a suitable replacement for magic. I'm thinking about calling Hermione Granger.

Reparo!


End Blog.

Laundry Fiasco

This morning I put a load of laundry in the wash, thinking that I'd dry it after I got home from the day's activities. So, when I came home tonight (around 8:30pm), I went downstairs to switch my clothes to the dryer. When I opened the garage door to the basement, I heard running water, and immediately, I knew, this was not a good sign.

Apparently, the water drainage hose for my washing machine had somehow come undone... and so the washer never knew that it was full to continue on with the cycle... which means that my washer was running ALL DAY. I think I probably turned it on somewhere around 11am. So it was like having a hose running in my basement for ... oh ... nine and a half hours.

Arg!

The good news is that the drain in my basement works marvelously now. No flooding or crazy water build up. It came out of the back of the washer and went right down the drain. The bad news is that I don't want to see my water bill. Ever. Oh, and my laundry never went through the cycle, so it's not clean. I suppose. Do you think running water over your clothes for 9 hours makes them clean? I dunno either. I hooked the hose back up, threw in some more soap, and am now letting it cycle through the wash.

Hopefully all works out properly.

Man, that's a lot of wasted water. But at least my basement isn't flooded.

That was not really a cool thing to come home to. And people wonder why I hate laundry so much. I vote to never have to do it again.


Karen: [in a laundromat] What is this place? It's pretty.
[starts to tap on a washing machine]
Karen: Where are all the fishes?
Grace: No, Karen, this is a laundromat. Normal people wash their clothes and wear them again.
Karen: Well, poor people are just plain clever!


End Blog.