Monday, April 05, 2010

Zombie Jesus Weekend

Carolyn went home this weekend to NJ to spend the holiday with her family. Seeing as how I don't really believe there is a giant man in the sky watching out for all of human kind who sent his son to die for our sins, I thought I'd spend the weekend at home, alone, doing absolutely nothing. Maybe sleeping, watching a ton of TV, that sort of thing. Indulging mostly in the sloth sin, I wager. With some gluttony thrown in for good measure.

Turns out, I didn't really do that much. Saturday I went to the driving range and hit a bucket of balls. I was pleasantly surprised at some of my drives. True, they still don't go very far, but I actually hit some nice shots with my three wood, the most horrible club I own. I hate it and never use it because I do so poorly with it. But surprisingly I got a few good shots with it. Then I went to lunch with Troy, played some video games with him and two other friends on Xbox Live, and did some online shopping for a ball marker/hat clip combo. (I found a Mustang one, which I bought.) Then I watched some TV, ate some Taco Bueno, and decided that I would try to fix my lawnmower.

Last year the self propel stopped working, and wouldn't you know, that dang lawnmower is really hard to push around without it. And because I'm a fat ass and don't enjoy exercise, it was probably harder than it should be. Anyway, I found out that a belt had slipped off of a pulley and I put it back together. My lawnmower is now working properly! Seeing as how I completed this task at 12:30am, I promptly went to bed.

Sunday morning I went golfing at 9:45am with Troy and Adam. I like golfing with them because they are only slightly better than me and I don't feel like I'm holding anyone up. Anyway, that was super fun. It was a really nice day after the sun came out and I got a bit sunburnt. I have a really awesome watch/glove line on my left hand.

We then ate at Five Guys, which was one of the only places we could find open on Easter. Turns out a lot of people take the whole thing pretty seriously. When we got there, we were starving, and there were three police cars in the parking lot. There seemed to be some sort of domestic dispute. I really wanted to know what was going on, but I never found out. It was nice to have a show with dinner though.

I came home and did a ton of laundry. Including all the sheets from the bed. Remy had a little anal leakage problem and stunk up the whole room with her stupid anal gland. I wish that she would give me some sort of warning so I could take her to the vet or something before this disgusting explosion happens in my house, but she doesn't. She just surprises me all the time with really unpleasant smells and then doesn't even bother to help clean it up. This happened Saturday night while I was sleeping. The smell was so bad it woke me up from dead slumber.

It's a good thing I really like that dog. Maybe they smell proportional to how much you love them. That's saying a lot, then.

I was going to mow the lawn, but it conveniently rained and I didn't have to.

Monday I went to work, came home, and mowed my front lawn for the first time in 2010. Who's excited that lawnmowing season had begun??? (I'm not. Although really early spring and really late fall are the times I actually enjoy it because I'm not dehydrating with every step.)


Before


After


Before


After


So, anyway, I guess the point here is that I was way more productive than originally planned. I'm I'm quite proud (Ah, another sin!) of my mechanical repair.



Side note: It POURED this morning. Like, only rain that Missouri can produce, rain. There was hail, just not here or at work. So, I get to work and I don't want to get out of the car because although I don't have far to go, I know I'll be SOAKED by the time I get to the door. So, I climb into the backseat of my car from the driver's seat, and found an umbrella in the back. I get out, open it up, and find that it had been booby-trapped. The thing fell apart into four pieces! I couldn't even figure out exactly what happened and threw the thing away. It wasn't an umbrella! It was just pieces!

So, that was pretty hilarious. If you are the person that booby-trapped my umbrella, KUDOS TO YOU. I'm sure the whole thing was pretty hilarious to anyone other than me.


That was pretty much my weekend. I will try to blog more better in the future...


End Blog.

1 comment:

Betty (Beth) said...

Hooray for an update!!

Also, I'd like to take credit for booby trapping your umbrella, even though I don't really think I did. Although I'm sure it could possibly have been me maybe. Maybe I broke it and was ashamed or something like that.

So you can blame me if you want, because I'd like to get a reputation as a Bad-Ass. :-)